The Totally Tidy Show with Mr Drippy
by She-is-a-deranged-lunatic
Summary: Mr. Drippy runs a late-night talk show, and kids around with video game celebrities.
1. Does this Impress Swaine?

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Swaine, Solid Snake, and Mario. And now...HEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRREEEEEEE'SSSSSS DRIPPY!" Announced the narrator as Mr. Drippy bounced up to his desk.

The band played Mr. Drippy's theme song as he shook hands with several members of the audience before sitting down in his seat.

"Give it up for Jazzy and the fabulous fairy four! Aren't they a bloomin' spazzy band?"

The lead singer, Jazzy the fairy, took a bow and said "Cheers, Drippy. I try!"

"Hello, mun! Hello! This is gonna be a tidy show! A REAL tidy show! We got a flippin' special interview tonite! The famous plumber himself Mario is gonna be here, ent it!" The audience cheered and clapped wildly at the news. "And Solid Snake is here too. But first, we're puttin' on a little talent pageant, ent it? We even 'ave a celebrity judge with us! Get your knickers ready for..." Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played a little jingle as an LED-Light sign spelling out "Does this impress Swaine" lit up. Then the audience shouted in unison "DOES THIS IMPRESS SWAAAAIIIINNNNEEE!?"

Curtains rolled up revealing a large stage, a podium with a green button and a red button on each side, a seat, and sitting in the seat was Swaine who had an 'I-am-NOT-amused...' look on his face. "The rules are flippin' simple, mun! Contestants will show off their talents, and Swaine has to press one of these two buttons at the end. If he's impressed, Swaine has to press the green switch, if he flippin' hates it, then he presses the red switch! Any questions?"

"When am I being paid for this again?" Swaine asked.

"Sorry, can't hear ye. Now let the contest BEGIN!" Drippy declared.

A Fairy timidly walked on stage.

"Hey there, mun! Tell us about yerself, ent it?" Drippy greeted.

"H-hi. My name is Flakey, and I'm gonna juggle Mohawks..."

"Oh, Juggling Mohawks, never heard of that before. Show us how it's done!" Drippy replied.

"Oh, boy..." Swaine mumbled.

The moment Flakey pryed open his wooden crate, the four Mohawks inside pecked and clawed at Flakey, cawwing indignantly.

"AAAAAaaaaaahhhhh! Get 'em off, get 'em off, get 'em off, get 'em ooooooooooffffffffff!" Flakey ran off the stage, the Mohawks chased after him, landing in a few extra pecks while they were at it.

"Ooooookaaaaayyy, that was a flippin' disaster...What does Swaine think?" Drippy asked.

Without a word, Swaine shook his head and slapped his hand down on the red button.

"That's cold...Okay, let's welcome our next contestants!"

Then a trio of women from Castaway cove walked on stage carrying two unlit torches apiece.

"And just who are you lovely ladies?" Drippy asked.

"We're the Poy sisters, and we're going to flip Swaine's world upside down with our Fire Dance!"

The audience cheered for the Poy sisters. The lead girl's familiar, a Ruffian, jumped out of her chest, then ignited all the dancer's torches with Fireballs.

"Oooh, a Fire Dance, sounds like some HOT stuff!" The band and several audience members forced a chuckle.

"Chuggaaconroy, eat yer heart out!" Jazzy joked.

"But first we'll need some music..." The leader of the trio gestured towards Jazzy. "Maestro, if you please..."

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy four played some adrenaline inducing music as the women spread out their arms side to side, and twirled their fiery torches, then they lifted their arms upwards and twisted their torches sideways while swinging their hips left to right in unison, and to top it all off the two younger sisters threw their flaming torches to the elder, who then juggled all six for about 2 minutes, then she allowed them all to fall, and blew out the flames with her sash.

The audience clapped and cheered as the Poy Sisters bowed simultaneously.

"Blimey! If that's not the best dance routine I ever saw I dunno what is! Swaine?" Drippy praised.

Swaine smirked and threw the green switch.

"Congratulations, ladies! Your prize for impressing Swaine is a one-year supply of Tikka Masala free of charge! Thank you for playing along, lovelies! Our next contestant fancies himself a real trickster, please welcome, Chris P. Bacon!"

A Hamelin man walked on stage wheeling a tarp covered cage.

"So, Chris, whatcha got planned with that cage, ent it?" Drippy asked.

"I could tell you, but it would be more fun to show you!" Chris said.

Chris entered the cage without removing the tarp, and signaled for a stage hand to lock the cage door. Then he yelled out "LIFT THE CAGE!"

Several stage-hands fastened the cage with rope, then lifted it up to the cieling. The cage stayed suspended for several minutes. Everybody's undivided attention was focused on the cage. Then Chris P. Bacon walked up to the rope, declared "And now I will lower the cage!", then undid the knot.

"Waaaiiitt if you're there, then who's in the cage!?" Drippy asked.

"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Swaine yelled from above.

Suddenly the cage plummeted to the floor below, the tarp and door flew open and Swaine tumbled out with an "OOMPHH...urrgghh".

"TA-DAH!" Chris declared proudly.

The audience clapped and cheered.

"Flippin' AMAZING, mun! That was astounding! Incredible even! Now let's hear Swaine's verdict, ent it!"

Swaine stumbled back to his seat and said "You know Chris, that was a rough ride, I could have been hurt, but since that was freaking epic, and since we have the same hometown, I must say I'm impressed!" and then he pressed the green button.

"Congrats, Mr. Bacon! You just earned yourself a Playtendo 4! Bask in it, you earned it!"

"YES!" Chris yelled out.

A stage hand walked on stage to hand Chris P. Bacon a Playtendo 4 package, who graciously accepted it and walked off stage.

"Our final contestant hails all the way from Ding Dong Dell...Give a proper tidy welcome to Catalina!"

A Grimalkin woman walked on stage carrying three bouncy balls walked on stage and said "Hello, Drippy. My name is Catalina and I'm going to balance these three balls on my nose for 30 seconds."

"Tidy! Give it a go, kitty!"

Catalina balanced the three balls on her nose starting with the smallest than the biggest. Then second after second went by until she successfully balanced them all on her nose for 30 seconds.

"Swaine, how did you like that?" Drippy asked.

Swaine sighed and pressed the red button. Drippy handed Catalina a T-shirt and said "Aww, don't feel bad, babe. You tried your hardest...Have this totally tidy shirt as a consolation prize."

"Thank you Drippy...Well you can't win them all..." Catalina said.

"We'll be right back, everybody! After the break I'll be talking to Mario himself! Stay flippin' tuned!"

This Episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by the Cat's Cradle Inn. Cat's Cradle; It's the Cat's Meow!

"Welcome back, everybody! My guest tonite is one of the longest-running, most famous video game heroes of all time...Please help me welcome the living legend, MARIO!"

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mario's theme song as Mario walked up to the desk and shook hands with Mr. Drippy before sitting down to talk.

"Ta, Mario!" Drippy greeted.

"Hello, Mister-a Drippy!" Mario greeted in return.

"So, what have ye been up too lately?" Drippy asked.

"Well, just-a recently I've-a starred in-a New Super Mario Brothers-a U and-a New Super Mario Brothers 3D, I've been in-a Super Mario 3D Land, I zoomed around in-a Mario-Kart-a 3D, and I'm-a busy preparing-a for Super Smash Brothers 4!" Mario answered.

The audience clapped excitedly for Super Smash Bros. 4.

"Whoah, Mario, you're a busy man, ent it?" Drippy said.

"Well, yes. I do-a have a heavy work-a schedule, I'm-a busy every day, but I wouldn't trade it for-a ninety-nine lives! I love-a what I do!" Mario answered proudly.

"So, Mario, you've starred in countless video games during your 28 year career...What was your personal crownin' moment?" Drippy asked thoughtfully.

"Oh my...I think my personal-a highlight-a was the first Super-a Mario Brothers-a for the original-a Nintendo, that's where it all-a began for me..." Mario said thoughtfully.

"Okay. So how's your brother comin'-along?" Drippy asked.

"Well, he's-a had his hands full with-a Luigi's Mansion: Dark Moon, and-a Luigi and I teamed up for Mario and Luigi: Dream Team, and I'm-a happy for him to-a see him have-a his chance in the spotlight, and-a he's-a joining me in the next Super Smash-a Brothers game. We may-a fight from-a time-to-time, but that's-a what-a brothers do." Mario answered.

"So then...How are things going with Princess Peach? Do you ever get tired of bailing her out of trouble?" Drippy asked.

"To be honest? Yes, and-a the only-a reason I'm-a saying this is because-a she's not-a here. But-a she's finally pulling her weight in Super Mario Brothers U." Mario mumbled.

The audience giggled and chuckled.

Mr. Drippy shook hands with Mario one last time for the night.

"That's Mario, everybody! Up next is Solid Snake!" Drippy yelled.

This program brought to you by the Hamelin Institute of Magical Technology. Creating the next generation of Magical Scientists today.

"Welcome back, everyone. My last guest for tonight is none other than Solid Snake. Oh, Snake!" Drippy called out.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played an instrumental cover of "Snake Eater" as Solid Snake walked up to the guest chair with Mr. Drippy.

"How are you, Solid Snake?" Drippy asked.

"Can't complain..." Snake replied.

"What have you been up to, eh?" Drippy asked.

"I've appeared in Metal Gear Rising, and we've just finished up Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes! And I brought a clip..."

"Tidy! Show it to us already, mun!" Drippy cheered.

Snake snapped his fingers and a visual guy put up a projector screen. Then the opening sequence from 'Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes.' played on the screen. The audience members clapped and cheered when the sequence was over. Snake smiled and took a drink of water.

"Wow, mun! That was flippin' incredible!" Drippy gasped."

"I hate to toot my own horn but that was really something." Snake said.

"So how long have ye been workin' on that?" Drippy asked.

"Since late 2012. It's been a long, wild ride." Snake answered.

"Now tell me, you've been spyin' on bad guys since 1986, right?" Drippy asked.

"Yes I have. I guess you can say I'm a grizzled veteran, both figuratively and literally." Snake said with a laugh.

"So tell us about Snake Eater 3D." Drippy said.

"Oh, man...I LOVED Snake Eater, that was probably the best moment of my career, and to relive it all, the pure nostalgia...I'm sorry, I'm rambling. What were you gonna say?" Snake asked.

"Thanks for the answer." Drippy said.

"You shouldn't thank me just yet, I got a present for ya!" Snake teased.

"Ye do?" Drippy asked.

Snake reached behind him and handed Drippy a cardboard box with an exclamation mark on it. The audience cheered out and clapped.

"Now you can practice being a spy like me!" Snake said.

"Blimey! There's awesome! Thanks a bloomin' ton! Solid Snake, everybody! That's it for tonight, tune in tomorrow for more fun!" Mr. Drippy declared.

Snake walked off the stage with a smirk and Drippy hid underneath his new box.


	2. Wander, Derwin, Megaman

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Derwin, Wander, and Megaman! And now...HEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEE'S DRIPPY!" Declared the announcer.  
Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mr. Drippy's theme song as Mr. Drippy hopped up to his desk. He shook hands with several members of the audience before he seated himself.  
"Hello, hello, hello, everyone! We got a flippin' tidy show for you today, ent it! Derwin is here to give us a little familiarology lesson. Wander, everyone's favorite Colossus killer is here, and Megaman is here to tell us about Super Smash Brothers 4!" Drippy declared.

The audience clapped, cheered and whistled.

"Let's get ouer first guest out here, shall we? Our first guest is the star of the legendary Playstation 2 classic 'Shadow of the Colossus' and he's here to tell us about the whole experience, please welcome WANDER!"

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played a cover of Revived Power as Wander walked on stage. The audience clapped and cheered wildly for Wander as he shook hands with Mr. Drippy and sat down in the guest chair. Mr. Drippy took a sip of strong coffee.

"Hi there, Wander, how are ye this fine evenin'?" Drippy greeted.  
"I'm just fine, Mr. Drippy." Wander said.  
"Well then, tell us about Shadow of the Colossus. What was that like?" Drippy asked.  
"Incredible. Just...absolutely incredible. The sheer adrenaline rush I felt when climbing on a Colossus's back, the thrill of being on top of a Colossus' head and being able to see the whole world around you...And the invigorating feeling you get when you kill a Colossus...Anyway you gotta play Shadow of the Colossus!" Wander said.  
"Yeah, I played it. The Graphics are flippin' epic! The music is incredible and the gameplay is proper fun!" Drippy chimed in.

"A real Colossal feat, you could say!" Jazzy chimed in.

"And the epic graphics are even better in the HD version!" Wander said.  
"So, is there anything about the game you didn't like?" Drippy asked.  
"Let it be known that I REEEAAALLLY hated slaying Dirge. Do you have any idea how tough it was to concentrate on shooting arrows and riding Agro at the same time? And how much it hurt when I couldn't escape Dirge in time...Urrgghh..."  
"So what's the big deal with the horns, ent it?" Drippy asked, pointing towards the horns on Wanders' head.  
"Uuuummmm It's a long story, I don't really wanna talk about it..." Wander sighed.  
"Alrighty then...That's Wander, everybody! We'll be right back with Derwin in a few! Stick around!" Drippy said to the audience.

Wander and Drippy shook hands one last time before the camera cut out for a commercial break.

-  
This program brought to you by Cawtermaster's armory. We don't mean to crow, but our weapons are the best in the business!

"Welcome back, everybody! Our next guest will be taking us on a tour of the Familiar Kingdom! Please welcome Derwin!" Drippy greeted.

Derwin wheeled several kennels onto the stage and shook Mr. Drippy's hand. Derwin sat down and took a drink of water.  
"Hello, Derwin!" Drippy greeted.  
"Hello, Drippy! Are you ready to see some familiars?" Derwin greeted back.  
Derwin opened one kennel and placed the Astralynx on the desk.  
"This is a Astralynx! It's a warm-blooded familiar. Member of the Arcana genus, its's ruling element is Darkness, and indigenous to the Ivory Tower."  
Mr. Drippy held out his hand to let the Astralynx smell it. The Astralynx smelled Drippys' hand, then pushed it's head against the palm of Drippys' hand and purred. Mr. Drippy proceeded to scratch it's head with one hand and stroke it's back with the other. In response the Astralynx cuddled up to Drippy.  
"Aww, You're just a friendly little blighter, ent ye?" Drippy cooed.  
"Astralynx is an Arcana familiar, like I mentioned before, so it's favorite treat is Sundaes. Would you like to give it a Sundae?" Asked Derwin.  
A stagehand then walked up on stage carrying a Sunflower Sundae in her hands. Drippy handed the Sunflower Sundae to the Astralynx. The Astralynx sniffed it, then slurped it up and meowled delightedly. Drippy pet the Astralynx one more time before Derwin placed the Familiar back in its' cage.

"Let's bring out our next familiar. This next familiar is a Dinoceros." Derwin said.  
Derwin walked offstage and then back on stage dragging a Dinoceros by a chain around its' neck.  
"The Dinoceros is a Draconian familiar, native to the rocky hilltops and cliffs of the southern summerlands. Its' ruling element is fire and physical."  
"Ohh, there's proper fierce, ent it. That thing doesn't bite, does it?" Drippy asked.  
"Only if its' cornered." Derwin answered.  
"Anyway, Dragon familiars prefer chocolate as a treat. Would you like to give it a Fairy Chocolate?" Derwin then handed Mr. Drippy a bar of Fairy Chocolate.  
Drippy gave the Fairy Chocolate to the Dinoceros, who greedily snatched it up from Drippy and stuffed it into it's mouth. Satisfied, the Familiar roared and beat its' chest. Derwin then lead the Dinoceros off the stage.

"Let's get our next familiar out here." Derwin said.

"Our next familiar is a Fyre Bird. It's an Avian familiar native to the mountainous regions of the Northern Summerlands. Its' dominant element is Fire, and it's favorite ice cream."  
Derwin opened up a bird cage containing a Fyre Bird. The Fyre Bird flew in three circles in the air to stretch its' wings. Finally, the familiar perched its' self on top of Drippy's head, sinking in its' talons.  
"Its' claw are really digging into my head..." Drippy mumbled painfully.  
"A Fyre Birds' claws are strong enough to crush Cocos.*" Derwin said.  
There was a small pause for Drippy, followed by "Get it off! Get it off! Get it OFF!"  
"Very well." Derwin said.  
Derwin whistled for the Fyre Bird, and the Fyre Bird re-perched itself on Derwin's finger. Derwin fed the Fyre Bird an Ice Cream as a reward for its' good behavior. The familiar happily hopped back into its' cage. Derwin closed the Fyre Birds' cage and opened another one in its' place.

"Our final familiar is a Hip-Hooray. It's a familiar belonging to the Genus Aquatica. Native to the Seas northwest of Autumnia, its' ruling element is water. Its' favorite treat is Pie."  
The Hip-Hooray did a loop-de-loop and gurgled in greeting to Mr. Drippy.  
"My, well aren't you the sociable type ent it?" Drippy said.  
A stage-hand gave Drippy a Pie. Drippy handed the Pie to the Hip-Hooray, who happily nommed on it. The Hip-Hooray made another loop-de-loop as Drippy tried to pour more water in to his cup but noticed his pitcher was empty.  
"Oh, wouldn't you know it mun, my pitcher is empty..." Drippy mumbled.  
The Hooray looked at Drippy like it had an idea. Then the Hip-Hooray shot out a blast of water. The water stream was so strong it sent Drippy flying offstage.  
"WHOOOOAAAAHHHHHHH!" Drippy screamed.

Musac could be heard as the camera cut away. The 'Please Stand By' image showed a Cameraman asleep on the job.

After the cutaway Mr. Drippy could be seen in his chair with a bandage on top of his nose. Drippy shook hands with Derwin again.  
"Thank you very much for your little zoology lesson. That was Derwin, everybody! Stay tuned, everybody! Megaman is coming right up!" Drippy said.

-  
This program is brought to you by Smiley and Surly's Weapon Shop. Why kill your enemies with swords, when you can kill them with comedy?  
-

"Welcome back to the show. My final guest is a living video game legend, here to talk about his experience as a Super Smash Brothers Newcomer. Please welcome the Blue Bomber himself, MEGAMAN!"

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Megaman's classic theme song as Megaman walked on stage. Megaman shook hands with Mr. Drippy before sitting down in the guest chair to talk.

"Ta, Megaman! How are you?" Drippy asked.  
"I'm alright, thank you." Megaman answered.  
"So, you've been selected as the next Super Smash Brothers newcomer..." Drippy started.  
Megaman rubbed his hand against the back of his neck.  
"Why, yes I have." He answered shyly.  
"Can we see a clip?" Drippy asked.  
The crowd cheered in agreement.  
"Hmmm...Alright, Drippy!" Megaman said.

Megaman snapped his fingers, and a projector screen appeared and played the official trailer for 'Super Smash Bros. 4'. When Megaman appeared on screen, the audience went berserk.

"Wow, mun! There's amazin'!" Jazzy chimed.  
"Congratulations, Megaman! You must be flippin' pumped for this!" Drippy declared.  
"Yeah, I'm flattered that they picked me. I noticed Nintendo was looking for guest stars, so I decided to audition on a whim, and I passed in flying colors. I felt honored to work with the greats of gaming. Mario, Link, Pikachu, Donkey Kong..." Megaman said.  
"Tell us about it!" Drippy said.  
Oh wow...gee...Well Mario is one of those energetic, bouncing-all-over-the-place kinda guys, but he's super friendly and passionate about his work, which you have to appreciate. Link, however, is somewhat cynical. He rarely ever talks to people that he doesn't know all that well, but he's a nice guy for the most part. Donkey Kong is very energetic and rough around the edges, and Pikachu was a cute little guy, but I had no idea what he was saying!" Megaman added jokingly.

"You have starred in countless games since your debut in 1987, what game are you the most proud to have starred in?" Drippy asked.  
"Well...Probably Megaman 2." Megaman answered.  
"Tidy...Well, could you show us your Mega Buster in action before you leave?" Drippy asked.  
A stage hand set up a Bulls' Eye Target on the stage.  
"Oh, alright!"  
Megaman position himself in front of the target, charged up a Mega Buster attack, and fired. The shot outright blew the target into solid black splinters.

"Flippin' epic, mun! That was Megaman, everybody! Thank you for coming and have a tidy night!" Drippy yelled out.

Mr. Drippy and Megaman shook hands one last time before leaving.

End of Episode 2

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: "Cocos" are my idea of what Coconuts would be called if they existed in the Ni No Kuni Universe.**

**Wander (C) SCEI**

**Megaman (C) Capcom**


	3. Episode 3: Booker Dewitt

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Booker Dewitt! Captain Falcon, and a special musical appearance by Daft Rogue! And now, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE'S DRIPPY!" The announcer declared.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mr. Drippy's theme song as Mr. Drippy bounced up to his chair.

"Hello, everybody! Looks like we got a full house tonight! We got a flippin' tidy show for you tonight, ent it. The great Booker Dewitt is going to be here!" Drippy started.  
The audience clapped and cheered.  
"And after that we got a musical performance from the one, the only, DAFT ROGUE!" Drippy added.  
The audience went absolutely berserk.

"But first, did you know I got to hang out with Captain Falcon? It's true, I got to talk to him a little bit, and he even took me for a spin in the Blue Falcon!" Drippy said.  
"You're a bloody liar!" Jazzy yelled from the bandstand.  
"I am NOT a liar, I've got a video to prove it! Roll the film!" Drippy retorted.

The video team played Mr. Drippy's video interview with Captain Falcon. Mr. Drippy and Captain Falcon sat in fold-up chairs on an F-Zero race track. The Blue Falcon was parked right in front of them.  
"Hello, Captain Falcon!" Drippy greeted.  
"Hi, Mr. Drippy." Captain Falcon greeted back.  
"So how are ye, mun?" Drippy asked.  
"I'm good." Captain Falcon replied.  
"So tell me, have ye been racing a long time?" Drippy asked.  
"Since 1991." Captain Falcon answered with a smirk on his face.  
"So do ye like F-Zero racing?" Drippy asked.  
"I love F-Zero racing!" Captain Falcon proudly answered.  
"What's been you're favorite F-Zero game?" Drippy asked.  
"Most likely F-Zero X." Captain Falcon said fondly.  
"So, um, Captain Falcon...er.." Mr. Drippy started.  
"What is it, Drippy?" Captain Falcon asked.  
"Well, see I was wonderin' if...Maybe you'd take me fer a ride in the Blue Falcon, ent it?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
Captain Falcon thought about what he said.  
"Alright, Drippy. Get in." Captain Falcon said.  
"TIDY! Thank you so much!" Drippy shouted while jumping for joy.

Captain Falcon was seated in the Cockpit of the Blue Falcon. Drippy was seated in Captain Falcon's lap. Captain Falcon pressed the Ignition Switch and the Blue Falcon took off before Mr. Drippy could even blink. The F-Zero racer moved so rapidly that Mr. Drippy's nose flew in every direction, and he was sinking into Captain Falcon's abdomen. Captain Falcon took a sharp turn to the right and Drippy slammed into the side of the vehicle interior. Then Captain Falcon took a sharp turn to the left and Drippy fell into Captain Falcon's lap.

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH WE'RE GOING TOO FAST! I THINK I'M GONNA FLIPPIN' CHUNDEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!" Mr. Drippy yelled out.  
"Not in HERE, you're not!" Captain Falcon said.

The Blue Falcon took one last turn, this time to the left, and then the F-Zero racing vehicle finally came to a complete stop. Drippy slammed into the cockpit window. Captain Falcon opened the doors and Drippy hopped out, kissing the race track floor.  
"Solid ground! I never thought I'd be so happy to see you, mun! There's beautiful!" Drippy said, still kissing the track.  
"Sheesh, Drippy. Calm down. It was just one lap." Captain Falcon said facepalming.

Then the video ended. The audience clapped.

"Let's get ouer next in-the-flesh guest out, ent it. He's the star of the ultra-mega-popular first-person-shooter 'Bioshock Infinite' and he's here to give us the 4-11 on the experience...Please help me welcome...BOOKER DEWITT!" Drippy shouted.

The audience clapped and cheered wildly as Booker Dewitt walked on stage. Booker Dewitt and Mr. Drippy shook hands as Booker sat down in the guest chair.  
"Hey there, Booker!" Drippy greeted.  
"Hi, Mr. Drippy." Booker said.  
"How are ye, tonight?" Drippy asked.  
"Eh, I can't complain, I guess..." Booker Dewitt answered.  
"So, what was it like to be in a city in the flippin' sky ain't it?" Drippy asked.  
"Ugh, to be honest? At first I felt dizzy and nauseous all the damn time. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but they actually had to retake several scenes because I retched a couple of times." Booker said with a sigh.  
Jazzy burst out into laughter.  
"SHUT UP!" Booker yelled.  
"Sorry about that, Booker. Sometimes Jazzy just can't control himself. Anyway, do you have a weapon of choice?" Drippy said.  
"I prefer the Machine Gun." Booker answered.  
"Ah, what was it like opening tears?" Drippy asked.  
"I must say it was fun bringing in automatons through tears to help us out." Booker said.  
"Anything else you wanna tell us?" Drippy asked.  
"Let it forever be known that I really, really, really, REEAALLLYY HATE Handymen..." Booker grunted.

"Point taken. Thanks fer showing up, mun!" Drippy said.  
"No problem." Booker replied.  
"That was Booker Dewitt, everybody! Don't touch that dial, Daft Rogue will be performing for us after the commercial break!" Drippy shouted.  
Booker Dewitt and Mr. Drippy shook hands again before Drippy walked off-stage.

-  
This episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by Sherhey's Chocolate. Sherhey's, if you familiars any other brand, you might as will be feeding them dirt.  
-

Mr. Drippy stood on stage with Daft Rogue and the vocalist.

"Welcome, back, everybody! My final guest tonite is the world-famous electro-house duet here to sing their smash hit "Get Tidy", DAFT ROGUE!"  
The audience cheered hysterically. Strobe lights flashed across the stage as the DJ's played the music and the vocalist sang along.

"She's up all night to this flippin' song!  
I'm flippin' up all night to get some!  
She's up all night fer good fun!  
I'm up all night to Get Tidy!

We're up all night to the flippin' sun!  
We're up all night to this flippin' song!  
We're up all night for proper fun!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!

We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!

She's up all night to this flippin' song!  
I'm flippin' up all night to get some!  
She's up all night fer good fun!  
I'm up all night to Get Tidy!

We're up all night to the flippin' sun!  
We're up all night to this flippin' song!  
We're up all night for proper fun!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!

We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!

We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!  
We're up all night to Get Tidy!"

The audience clapped and cheered wildly.  
"My band ent got nothin' on them, mun!" Jazzy mumbled.

End of Episode 3.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I know this chapter was short, but there's something I was thinking about doing. For my next chapter I was thinking of having the King of All Cosmos come on the show and say funny stuff for a David Letterman 'Top 10.' tribute. If you have any suggestions for my fanfiction, send via private message or story review.


	4. Link, Zelda and Pikachu

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Link and Princess Zelda! Pikachu! And Chef Raj Mahal! And now, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE'S Drippy!" The announcer declared.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mr. Drippy's theme song as Mr. Drippy bounced on to a kitchenette on the stage.  
"Greetings, mun! We got a flippin' tidy show for you guys tonight, ent it! We got the great Link and Princess Zelda! We got Pikachu! And Chef Raj Mahal is here to show us how he works his culinary magic!" Mr. Drippy greeted.  
The audience clapped and cheered.  
"Well, then...Let's have ouer first guest on, ent it?" Drippy started.  
"Ouer first guest is the celebrity chef Raj Mahal, and he's here to make his Tikka Mahala for us, oh, Raj!" Drippy called out.

Raj Mahal walked out on stage, and then took his place next to Mr. Drippy at the head of the kitchenette.  
"Hi there, Raj!" Mr. Drippy greeted.  
"Hello, Mr. Drippy!" Raj Mahal greeted.  
"So, youer delicious Tikka Mahala is famous worldwide." started Mr. Drippy.  
"Why, yes. Yes it is." Raj Mahal said with a blush.  
"Can we...can we see just how you work youer magic?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Hhmmm...Alright, Mr. Drippy!" Raj Mahal said.  
"Well, first off. We have all the ingredients laid out for us, Fluffy Rice, Tender Beef, Tubber, Yogurt, Kapipra, Hottamalay Peppers, Calintro, Munteg, Yacenne, Motamo Juice, Mucin, 1 large white Onoin, Gingy, Beannut Oil, and Emil Juice." Raj Mahal started, waving his hand over all the ingredients neatly lined up on the table.

Raj Mahal gestured towards the rice cooker containing the Fluffy Rice, and then turned it on. "We'll turn on the rice cooker so the rice is ready by the time we're done here!"

Raj Mahal tenderized the beef and explained "First, we must tenderize the Beef, to make sure we get the right texture. Next..."

Raj Mahal then combined the yogurt, emil juice, carlig and beannut oil and said "Then we whisk together the Carlig, beannut oil, yogurt and emil juice to make the sauce. When we're done with that..."  
Raj Mahal ground up the rest of the spices with a mortar and pestle and said "Then we blend the rest of the spices together. Be sure not to grind the spices too finely, however!"  
"Blimey, youer fast at this, Raj!" Mr. Drippy remarked.  
"I've had years of practice!" Raj answered.

Raj Mahal then oiled up a pot with Tubber and started caramelizing the Onoin. "Now we must sautee the Onoin in a Tubbered pot until it caramelizes, which usually takes 5 minutes. Just keep in mind that Onoins rarely, if ever caramelize evenly, as they cook so quickly over medium-high heat. Then we reduce the heat..."  
Raj then added the Motamo Juice, yogurt mixture, and spices. "Then we add the Motamo Juice, spices, and the Yogurt sauce. Then we let the sauce simmer on a lower heat for about 10 minutes, or until it thickens."

"*sniff* ooohhhh, that smells so flippin' good! I can barely contain myself!" Mr. Drippy said excitedly.  
The audience clapped in agreement.  
"That's a spicy-a meat-a ball!" Jazzy added.

"While the sauce is cooking..." Raj Mahaj started, putting the Tender Beef in an oiled skillet. "Let's sautee the Tender Beef." Raj then turned the second burner on medium-high heat. "If the beef cooks too quickly, I recommend reducing the heat. Cook for about 8 minutes total."

Raj Mahal then Transferred the cooked Tender Beef to a Cutting Board. "Next, we have to cut the Tender Beef into 1-inch strips, and then add the beef to the sauce to continue cooking for at least 5 minutes. Finally, we'll serve the Tikka Mahala over the Fluffy Rice and garnish the Tikka Mahala with the Hottamalay Peppers and the Calintro, and it's ready to eat!"

Raj handed a freshly prepared plate to Mr. Drippy and declared proudly "Dinner is served! Eat up!"  
Mr. Drippy took one bite of the Tikka Mahala, and he shouted out in delight. "You really outdid youerself this time, Raj, my man! You did a flippin' fabulous job!"  
"Why, thank you, Mr. Drippy!" Raj Mahal said shyly.  
"Can I have just a little taste, ent it?" Asked Jazzy.  
"Why not? There's enough for a crowd!" Raj declared happily.  
"Speaking of! I have one coupon for a free Tikka Mahala that I'm givin' away to one lucky member of the audience. The coupon goes to the guest in seat... ... ...223! COME ON UP!"

A little boy from Yule jumped out of his seat and walked up to Mr. Drippy with his arms swinging in the air triumphantly. The boy smiled as he accepted the coupon from Mr. Drippy. "And what's youer name, ye little blighta?" Drippy asked.  
"Jack F, Mr. Drippy, and I'm 13." Answered the boy.  
"Ah, well congratulations, Jack!" Drippy cheered.  
As Jack F. walked off the stage with his coupon Drippy shouted "We'll be right back everybody! Don't touch that dial! What is a dial, anyway?"

_Tonight's Episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by the Al Mamoon department of Tourism. Al Mamoon, it's a great place! No bull!_

End Commercial Break.

"Welcome back to the Totally Tidy Show, everybody! My next two guests are iconic stars of the Legend of Zelda series and they're here to tell us all about it. Please welcome Link and Zelda!" Drippy declared.

Link and Zelda waved hello to several cheering audience members as they walked on stage. Link was the first to shake hands with Mr Drippy, then Princess Zelda shook hands before the three of them sat down to talk.  
"So, Link, Zelda, how are ye, tonight?" Drippy asked.  
"Fine." Link said.  
"Very good, thank you for asking." Zelda answered.  
"So how long have ye been in the medieval fantasy/adventure genre business?" Asked Mr. Drippy.  
"28 years." Link said.  
"Wow, that's a flippin' milestone! Give these guys a hand, mun!" Drippy cheered.  
The audience clapped in approval.  
"So, let me just say, outta ALL the Zelda games, my favorite hands-down has GOT to be Ocarina of Time! Love that game inside and out! What is your personal crowning moment in the series?" Drippy asked.  
"Well, Ocarina of Time is the most famous game we've ever starred in but for me, my favorite is definitely Twilight Princess." Princess Zelda answered.  
"I like Link to the Past." Link answered.  
"So, um...Speaking of Link to the Past, tell me about A Link Between Worlds." Drippy asked.  
"Well, I thought A Link Between Worlds was a mixed bag. On one hand, there's a handy item-renting system, enough difficulty for a challenge, and plenty of secrets and collectibles waiting to be unearthed, and the dungeons in this game are some of the most brilliantly designed dungeons in years...However, the game feels very familiar to fans of a Link to the Past. A little TOO familiar actually." Link answered.  
"And I thought the visual effects looked kind of...off-putting at times." Zelda added.

"Now tell me about the next Legend of Zelda game for the Wii U..." Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Oh, um, the next project is so top secret we're not even allowed to talk about it. Sorry, Drippy..." Zelda said.  
Link shook his head in reinforcement.

"That's alright. Thanks anyway...Now tell me about Super Smash Brothers 4..." Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Oh, the 3DS port and the Wii U port will have port exclusive characters and stages. Greninja will be a playable character in the 3DS port, Skyloft will be a stage in the Wii U port, and Megaman will be starring in both versions." Zelda explained.  
"Megaman is a cool guy." Link added.  
"Tidy! Before ye go, let's take a group selfie!"  
With that, Mr. Drippy magically pulled out a digital camera, positioned himself between Zelda and Link, and snapped a group selfie of Link, Mr. Drippy, and Zelda. Drippy and Zelda had smiles on their faces, Link had a surprised look on his face.  
"Thank ye very much! Link and Zelda, everyone! When we come back, Pikachu will be with us! Stick around!" Drippy said.

Tonight's episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by Jackal and Hide (tm) Tonic. Why settle for the rest, when you can have the best?

"Welcome back to the show, everybody! My next guest is the star of the legendary pokemon games...and is SO cute! Please welcome Pikachu, oh Pikachu!" Mr. Drippy said.

The audience clapped and cheered as Pikachu crawled onto the stage and then sat down in the guest chair. Mr. Drippy and Pikachu shook hands. (More like hand and paw.)

"Heya, Pikachu, how are ye feelin' tonight?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Pika!" Pikachu answered cheerfully.  
"You'er feeling...'Pika'...Tonight?" Mr. Drippy asked, confused.  
"heheheheheheheh! Drippy booked a guest who can't even flippin' talk! I'm in stitches, mun! hahahahahahahahahahaha!" Jazzy joked.  
"I am gonna have to have a serious talk with my agent later! Does anybody in the audience speak pokemon!?" Drippy asked frustratedly.  
"I speak pokemon!" A Grimalkin man said.  
"Well, whaddaya waitin' for? Come on up, mun! I need an interpreter here!" Drippy declared.  
The male Grimalkin walked up to the second guest chair while waving to the audience shyly.  
"So, Pikachu, what've you been up to, lately?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Pi Pika!" Pikachu answered.  
"Pokemon X and Pokemon Y." The Grimalkin man translated.  
"Ah, yes! That was a good one! What do you think, Pikachu?" Mr. Drippy asked back.  
"Chu! Pikachu-Pi!" Pikachu answered.  
"I liked X and Y, but to be fair I liked ALL Pokemon games!" The Grimalkin translated.  
"Tidy! So what can ye tell me about Generation 7?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Pikachu! Pika!" Pikachu answered.  
"I can't say anything important, but I will say it will be amazing!" The Grimalkin translated.  
"Alright, anything on a Ruby and Sapphire remake?" Drippy asked.  
"Chu." Pikachu answered.  
"Maybe." The Grimalkin man translated.  
"Stick around with me a little longer, okay, Pikachu? In the immortal words of Billy Jigsaw, I want to play a game!" Drippy said.  
"Pikachu!" Pikachu answered.  
"Sure, Drippy! I'd love to play!" The Grimalkin translated.

"Totally Tidy! We'll be right back, everybody!" Mr. Drippy shouted.

-  
Tonight's episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by Swift Solutions.

After the commercial break, Mr. Drippy and Pikachu stood in a fiber-glass chamber wearing velcro vests. Fabric 'Poke Balls' were stuck to a roll of velcro wrapped around the fiberglass chamber wall.

"Welcome back, everybody! Pikachu and I are gonna play "Catch the Pokemon!". How this game works is Pikachu and I will throw these fabric Poke Balls at each other for 1 minute, and whoever manages to hit the other person with Poke Balls wins! Ready?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
Pikachu nodded and said "Pika!"  
"Tidy! 3...2...1...GO!~" Mr. Drippy cheered.

Pikachu and Mr. Drippy plucked fabric poke balls from the wall. Pikachu was spot-on with his accuracy. But Mr. Drippy could grab more poke balls at a time. Pikachu and Drippy had a lot of fun running, jumping and throwing poke the time the counter stopped, Pikachu had 17 Poke Balls on his velcro vest. Mr. Drippy had 21 poke balls on his velcro vest.  
"Well, Pikachu! It looks like ye beat me! Congratulations, and thanks for playing!" Mr. Drippy, stretching out his hand.  
"Pikachu Pika!" Pikachu answered, shaking Drippy's hand.  
"Pikachu says Thank you for having me!" The Grimalkin man translated.

"That's it for tonight, everybody, but we'll be back tomorrow, ent it! Have a tidy night!" Mr. Drippy shouted.

End of Episode

Author's note: I know Tikka Masala is traditionally made with chicken, but in Ni No Kuni it's made with beef...so you're gonna have to roll with it.


	5. Mother's day Special

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Fairy Godmother! And Spyro! And now, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE'S Drippy!" The announcer declared.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mr. Drippy's theme song as Mr. Drippy bounced on to the stage.  
"Boy, this is gonna be a flippin' fun show, ent it! Spyro is gonna be here!" Mr. Drippy started.  
"But first and foremost, Mothers' Day is comin' up...Whether youer Fairy, Grimalkin or Tomte, everyone has a mum. And in honor of the occasion, I think I'll give my mum a video call, ent it. Turn on the projector screen, mun!" Mr. Drippy said.  
A giant projector's screen dropped down, then the image of the Fairy Godmother appeared on screen. Mr. Drippy hopped up onto the desk.  
"Ta, Mum! How are ye?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
""How am I?" he asks...I've been waitin' months to get a spot on yer show, and ye don't even love me enough to bring me on youer show in the flesh!?" Griped the Fairy Godmother.  
"With all due respect, mum, youer too big to fit in the studio...Besides, I doubt ye can even leave the island." Mr. Drippy answered.  
"And ye have the gall to call me fat! Youer own mother! And ye call me FAT!? Where, oh, WHERE did I go wrong, ent it!?" Fairy Godmother cried out.  
"Relax, mum. I just called to tell ye happy mother's day, ent it." Mr. Drippy said.  
"Wait. Ye did?" Asked the Fairy Godmother.  
Mr. Drippy gestured towards Jazzy and whispered "Maestro, can ye help me out, ent it?"  
Jazzy nodded and signaled towards the band. The band then played some sappy, emotional music to accompany Drippy.  
"I just called to say happy mother's day, and to say...well...to...say I love ye, mom! Thank ye fer everything!" Mr. Drippy confessed.  
"I love ye too, Drippy! I love ye with all me heart! It means so much to me that ye called to tell me that!" Fairy Godmother yelled out.  
"Momma's little Fairy!~ Momma's little Fairy!~" Jazzy taunted.  
Drippy just shot a threatening stare at Jazzy, and then turned back to the screen. "Mum, it's been great talkin' with ye."  
"Dun be a stranger, ent it! Let's talk again, sometime!" Fairy Godmother said.  
Then the projector screen turned off.  
"Now, then, it's time for the commercial break. But first, let's show a tribute to video game moms everywhere, ent it?" Mr. Drippy said. "Roll the slideshow!"  
Jazzy played some more sappy emotional music as the video technician showed a photo slideshow, starting with Oliver and Alicia, then with Ash Ketchum and his mom, then little Dante and Eva, then Lucas, Claus and Hinawa, then Lan Hikari and Mama, then Chrono and his mother, then Toon Link and his grandmother, a shot of Mr. Drippy and Fairy Godmother, and then finally, a picture of a heart captioned "Happy Mother's Day."

"When we come back, Spyro will be with us!" Drippy shouted.

-  
Tonight's episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by Hamelin. Hamelin: A great place to bring home the Bacon!  
-

After the Commercial Break, Mr. Drippy was holding a copy of 'Spyro the Dragon' for the original Sony Playstation while sitting at his desk.  
"Welcome back to the program, everyone! Our next guest is a living video game legend. Please help me welcome Spyro, oh, Spyro!" Mr. Drippy said.  
The audience clapped for Spyro as Spyro and Sparx greeted Mr. Drippy, then sat down.  
"Hello, Spyro! Thanks for coming!" Mr. Drippy.  
"Hi, Mr. Drippy. Thanks for having me!" Spyro greeted back.  
"So, um...How long have ye been burnin' up the baddies, ent it?" Drippy asked.  
"Since 1998." Spyro answered proudly.  
"Anyway, I can't help but notice youer little buzzin' friend there, ent it. What's his name?" Drippy asked, gesturing towards Sparx.  
"Oh, that's Sparx! We go everywhere together! He's my bestest buddy!" Spyro answered happily.  
"Bizzz bizz bizzz bizzz! (You got that right!)" Sparx buzzed in affirmation.  
"Tidy! And out of all the games ye've starred in, what's been youer personal favorite?" Drippy asked.  
"Oooh, that's a toughie, but I think it's a dead tie between Year of the Dragon and Enter the Dragonfly!" Spyro answered.  
"And youer least favorite?" Drippy asked.  
"Definitely A Hero's Tail. That game had so many bugs and glitches it was literally unplayable!" Spyro answered.  
"Ta, so, anyway...What's it like sharing the spotlight in Skylanders? Do you miss being able to do youer own thing?" Drippy asked.  
"Yes, yes I do. I wish I could do my own thing, but it's fun working with my new friends most of the time, and I've really expanded my horizons." Spyro answered.  
"Now then, I have one last question. But I'm afraid to ask." Mr. Drippy started.  
"It's alright, don't be shy." Spyro reaffirmed.  
"Well...I...was wondering...well, if I could ride ye?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Hmmm...well...Alright, Mr. Drippy." Spyro answered.  
"Tidy, mun!" Mr. Drippy cheered.  
"Can I come along too, ent it?" Jazzy asked.  
Angered, Spyro chased after Jazzy, who promptly ran like hell away.  
"Bizz bizz!(Calm down, Spyro!)" Sparx buzzed frantically.  
"Spyro, no! He didn't mean it! He was only jokin' around! Blimey...We'll be right back, everybody!" Mr. Drippy cried out.  
Jazzy ran all around the stage like mad as Spyro angrily chased after him.  
"Waaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh! Someone get him away from meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Jazzy cried out!

Tonight's episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you by Jarbucks Coffee. Jarbucks: For when you need coffee real fast, but don't need it to be real good...

After the Commercial break, Mr. Drippy and Spyro and Sparx were outside the studio, in the northern summerlands. "Welcome back to the show, everybody!" Mr. Drippy said.  
"Are you ready, Mr. Drippy?" Spyro asked.  
"I'm more than ready, mun!" Mr. Drippy answered.  
"Then climb on my back and let's go!" Spyro said.  
Mr. Drippy climbed onto Spyro's back, and Spyro took off immediately.  
Spyro picked up speed, nose dived, regained his height, and loop-de-looped in the air.  
"Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiidddddddddyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!" Mr. Drippy yelled.  
Spyro barrel-rolled and continued on with the loop-de-loops, and when he got tired, decided to gently land on top of a tall rock formation.  
"That was amazin' Spyro, Thanks a flippin' ton!" Drippy said with an excited holler.  
"You're welcome Mr. Drippy. Thanks for having me." With that, Spyro glided down to the ground below.  
"Now how am I gonna get down, ent it?" Mr. Drippy said, looking down and around.

End of Episode.

I know this chapter has been short, but that's what I get for trying to write an episode when I don't feel so hot...


	6. Chapter 6 Okami Amaterasu

"It's the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy! With special guests Okami Amaterasu! Banjo and Kazooie! And now, HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEE'S Drippy!" The announcer declared.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played Mr. Drippy's theme song as Mr. Drippy bounced on to the stage.  
"Boy, this is gonna be a flippin' fun show, ent it! Okami Amaterasu is gonna be here with us! Banjo and Kazooie are gonna be here with us! But first, how about I read some fan messages, ent it?" Mr. Drippy said.  
Mr. Drippy then let envelopes fall out of an unlocked box. Then picked up one of the envelope, and opened it.  
"Let's see...Felina writes 'What is your favorite type of skin lotion?' Mine is 'Silence of the Lambs brand Lotion', rub it on the skin, or else it gets the hose again!"  
Mr. Drippy then picked up and opened another envelope. "Boaris writes 'Do you think Queen Cassiopeia is hot?' Errr... ...I...I'm not obligated to answer that one, ent it. Next!"  
With that, Mr. Drippy crumpled up that letter into a ball and chucked it offstages. Mr. Drippy then picked up another envelope, and then opened it.  
"Let's see...My Neighbor Tomtoro writes 'Have you ever considered visiting Yule and Ice-Skating here? That would be fun, right?'... ...You know, that's not a bad idea. I'll look into that, mun!"  
Mr. Drippy opened up another envelope.  
"Ali and Yasmina write 'Hello, Mr. Drippy. We're a huge fan of youer talk show and we watch it every night. It's absolutely hilarious and very entertaining. We just have one little suggestion: Can you maybe have The King of All Cosmos on youer show, sometime?'...Hey! That's a flippin' tidy idea! Thanks fer the tip!"  
"Unfortunately, we only have enough time to read one more letter...Let's see..."  
Mr. Drippy opened up one last envelope for the night.  
"Let me see here...Purrvis writes 'I'm a huge fan, and I gotta ask: How do you keep youer lantern so shiny?' I wash me lantern in the blood of virgins. Just kidding, just kidding! I polish it with shoe polish, works like a flippin' charm!"  
Mr. Drippy then pushed all the unopened letters off his desk and smiled. "Stay tuned, everybody! Ammy is coming to talk to us after the commercial break!"

-  
Tonight's Episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you in part by Playstation 4. We didn't kill Nintendo. Nintendo killed itself. We just danced on it's grave.

"Welcome back, everybody! Our first guest is the star of the legendary game 'Okami'. Please welcome Okami Amaterasu. Amaterasu! Here girl*!" Mr. Drippy hollered.  
Okami Amaterasu ran up onto the stage, then licked Mr. Drippy across the face in greeting, her tail moving a mile a minute.  
"Heel! Down girl! Heel!" Drippy protested.  
Ammy settled down and sat down on the floor.  
"So, Ammy, how are you doing tonight?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Woof, woof!" Amaterasu barked happily.  
"Pardon? I don't speak Wolf..." Mr. Drippy said sweat-dropping.  
"Woof!"  
"Ammy! Damn it, what did I tell ya about running off like that? We talked about this!" A voice from behind the stage hollered out.  
A tiny, green-glowing dot bounced on to the stage and jumped on top of the Sun God's head.  
"Anyway, hiya Mr. Drippy! The name's Issun. Issun the Wandering Artist!" Issun greeted.  
Issunboushi pulled out a painting scroll and gave it to Mr. Drippy.  
"Whaddaya think? Impressive, isn't it?" Issun bragged.  
"There's beautiful! Put this on the screen, Glitzy!" Mr. Drippy praised.

Glitzy, the AV technician fairy, projected the image on the painting scroll for the entire audience to see. The image depicted Okami Amaterasu facing down Orochi. The audience clapped and cheered in agreement. Amaterasu then tried to eat Issun for the millionth time, but Issun pushed his way out of her mouth and onto the stage. The audience laughed.  
"Oh, come on, Ammy! You humiliated me on live T.V! I hope you're proud of yourself!" Issun yelled, throwing a fit.  
When Issun finally regained his composure, he said "Anyway, I can talk to animals. So I can answer any question you throw at Ammy for her. Fire away, Drippy!"  
"Tidy. So, Ammy...When did you make youer big debut?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Woof, woof woof!" Amaterasu answered happily.  
"Ammy says 'Eight years ago, in 2006'. Did you know we had been working on this game since 2004?" Issun translated, adding his own 2 cents.  
"So, what was your favorite thing about Okami?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Woof, woof!" Amaterasu answered.  
"Ammy says 'The Art Direction. The graphics and gorgeous!'." Issun translated.  
"That's pretty much everybody's favorite thing about the game, ent it." Mr. Drippy mused.  
"Anyway, the biggest mechanic in this game is your Celestial Brush." Mr. Drippy started.  
"Bark." Amaterasu barked.  
"Ammy says duh!" Issun translated.  
"Can we see how you use it right now?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
There was a pause from Amaterasu, followed by a "Woof."  
"Ammy says why not?" Issun translated.  
Amaterasu painted a curly-cue in the air and summoned a random gust of wind in the studio. The wind sent Mr. Drippy flying out of his chair and clear across the room. The show's camera feed cut away to a 'Please Stand By' still depicting a cameraman passed out with a bottle of liquor in his hand. When the show returned, Mr. Drippy had a big bandage on his nose. Amaterasu whimpered.  
"Ammy says sorry. She didn't know her own power." Issun translated.  
"Ahh, It'll heal, ent it? Would you mind showing us a safer Brush technique?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
A fairy stage-hand wheeled in a dormant Cherry Tree in a pot. Amaterasu painted a circle around the tree's crown. The tree exploded in a flurry of beautiful pink blossoms. The audience clapped.  
"How famous is Okami? Did it win any awards?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Ruff ruff ruff!" Amaterasu barked.  
"Ammy says the original received IGN's Game of the Year award!" Issun translated.  
"Tell me about Okami HD." Mr. Drippy said.  
"Bark bark bark bark bark!" Amaterasu barked.  
"Ammy says she was so excited to be able to re-live the high-point of her career. And I appreciate that Capcom stayed true to the Clover Studio original!" Issun translated.  
"What other than Okami have you been doing lately?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Woof woof woof woof Woof!" Amaterasu barked.  
"Ammy says she starred in a spin-off for the DS, had tons of fun getting to know the Marvel cast in Marvel vs. Capcom 5. And I even made a cameo appearance in Asura's Wrath." Issun translated.  
"Tidy. Thank you so much for coming on my show, wolfy!" Mr. Drippy said, outstretching his hand.  
"Woof!" Amaterasu barked, placing her paw on top of his hand.  
"Ammy says thanks for having us!" Issun translated.

"That was Okami Amaterasu and Issun, everybody! When we come back, Banjo and Kazooie will be here! Stay tuned!"

-  
Tonight's Episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you in part by Raj Mahal's. Your taste buds will love you for it, but your colon will hate you!

After the Commercial Break:  
Mr. Drippy sat at his desk holding a boxed copy of 'Banjo-Kazooie' for the N64. "Ouer next guests are the dynamic duo of the Nintendo 64 classics 'Banjo-Kazooie' and 'Banjo-Tooie' and they're here to talk about the whole experience. Give it up for Banjo and Kazooie!" Mr. Drippy declared.

Jazzy and the Fabulous Fairy Four played a cover of 'Gruntilda's Lair'. Kazooie peeked out of Banjo's backpack as the Honey Bear and Mumbo Jumbo walked on stage. Banjo and Mumbo Jumbo shook hands with Mr. Drippy before sitting down in the Guests' Seat.  
"Hello, Banjo! Hello, Kazooie!" Mr. Drippy greeted.  
"Hello, Mr. Drippy!" Banjo greeted back.  
"Thanks for having us, Sparkler Face!" Kazooie said.  
"Now, anyway. You started out in 'Diddy Kong Racing' and a year or two later you got youer own game and a co-star. What was that experience like?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Oh, wow! Banjo-Kazooie was an amazing experience. I had just as much fun starring in the game as my fan did playing the game. The game itself had a fun, happy, lively atmosphere. It got harder and harder farther in, but the difficulty increase was slow and steady." Banjo answered.  
"I really liked the music, but I hated having to shoot those eggs out my mouth. That and the Beak Bomb technique HURT." Kazooie answered.  
"Mumbo like special effects. Make the transformations look cool. Graphics revolutionary for 1998 standards." Mumbo Jumbo answered.  
"Let me talk about Banjo-Tooie. A lot of people say it's the flippin' best in the series. Tell us a little about that!" Mr. Drippy said.  
"Here's some fun nerd trivia? Did you know that Glitter Gulch Mine, Witchyworld and Hailfire Peaks were planned for the first game?" Banjo asked.  
"I did not know that!" Mr. Drippy gasped.  
"Like being main character and going out and about. Me people person. Not like being cooped up in hut all day" Mumbo said.  
"And the Boss Battles were exciting. Plus I liked getting out of that sweaty backpack. My wings get stiff in there time to time." Kazooie said.  
"Stop-N-Swop?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"Not that again!" Banjo answered with a sigh.  
"They're never gonna let that die, are they?" Kazooie said.  
"Well, Stop-N-Swop was an advertising gimmick for Banjo-Tooie that wouldv'e allowed gamers to trade cool data back-and-forth between Banjo-Kazooie and Banjo-Tooie. The project was scrapped because this trick required switching out cartridges while the console was still powered on, but Nintendo cut corners, so the N64 would not have been able to handle all that strain...Now can we PLEASE put this to rest?" Banjo explained.  
"Now tell me about Nuts N Bolts...Was it all you expected it to be?" Mr. Drippy asked.  
"To be honest? I'd say it was only about 40% of what I was expecting. I thought it strayed too far from the original story...And besides, riding around in all those vehicles made me motion-sick all the time. Which is why I didn't really like starring in SEGA All-Stars Racing all that much..." Banjo answered.  
"They made me mechanic. Me no mechanic, me shaman. Not cut out for building." Mumbo said.  
"Anything else, Dangly?" Kazooie asked.  
"Nothin' else, really. Thank you very much for coming guys!" Mr. Drippy said.  
"Thank you for having us." Mumbo said.  
"When we come back, Banjo and pals will be performing for us! Stick around!" Mr. Drippy said.

Tonight's Episode of the Totally Tidy Show with Mr. Drippy brought to you in part by Bill's Burgers. Making the best Cheeseburgers in town since 2011

"Welcome back to the show, everybody! Give a big hand for the cast of Banjo-Kazooie as they play for us tonight!" Mr. Drippy urged.

The audience clapped supportingly for Banjo, Kazooie and Mumbo-Jumbo. The trio then played the theme song for the original Banjo-Kazooie game. Banjo played the banjo, Kazooie played the kazoo, and Mumbo Jumbo played the saxophone, and the xylophone, and the fiddle. When it was over, the audience clapped and cheered loudly.

"Thank you very much for coming, guys! That's ouer show fer tonight, ent it! Come see us again tomorrow night!" Mr. Drippy yelled out. 


End file.
